Start Showing Up for Yourself Again
Dressing for myself, podcast with Evy Poumpouras, things you can do for yourself for self-care that doesn't cost any money
Lately, I've been reflecting a little more on what it means to truly care for myself—not just in grand, sweeping gestures, but in the smallest, most ordinary moments. The kind of self-care that happens quietly, when no plans are on the calendar and no one is watching.
It's surprisingly easy to fall into a pattern of only getting dressed when there's somewhere to be. But I've discovered something profound: how I show up for myself in the in-between moments matters just as much as how I present myself to the world.
Getting dressed has become more than just a daily necessity. It's an act of self-respect, a deliberate choice to take care of myself. Whether I'm wearing a comfortable matching set or my favorite pair of jeans, these choices remind me that I don't need an external occasion to feel good.
Recently, I listened to a podcast with Evy Poumpouras, a former US Secret Service agent, that completely shifted my perspective on personal presentation. She made a point that has stuck with me: personal safety is about how you carry yourself. As a mom of 2 with a baby at my hips all the time, I'm acutely aware of vulnerability. There's a stark difference between someone walking hunched over their phone, looking disconnected, and someone who appears alert and put-together. Not to think negatively, but predators look for easy targets—and I refuse to be one.
When I'm out, especially with my baby and son, my appearance and demeanor matter. Being dressed, standing tall, looking aware. It's about sending a clear message as well: I'm present, I'm aware, and I'm not an easy target. It’s not that I leave the house thinking about this, but always something in the back of my mind.
Self-talk has been another crucial aspect of my journey. I'm learning to be gentler with myself, to replace critical internal dialogue with compassion. Instead of the persistent voice that used to say, "You shouldn’t speak up here. You should be doing more," I'm cultivating a kinder narrative: "You should share your thoughts. You’re doing enough."
One practical approach I've embraced is creating a simple capsule wardrobe—a collection of pieces that make me feel confident without overwhelming me. My essentials for this spring include:
A perfect pair of straight-leg jeans
A crisp white button-down shirt
Trousers that fit nicely, in a few neutral colors
Elevated everyday matching sets
Versatile neutral knits for layering
Comfortable classic sneakers and sandals
A few good cardigans, blazers, and a trench coat
A reliable tote that elevates even the most mundane errands
My current inspo for Spring
When you genuinely love everything in your closet, getting dressed becomes a meaningful ritual rather than a thoughtless task.
I'm sharing this because I know how easy it is to lose yourself in the daily shuffle — especially in this season of life (deep in my mom life with young children!). But I'm learning that taking time to care for myself isn't selfish — it's what allows me to show up better for everyone else.
I wrote down some things you can do to practice self-care that doesn’t cost a dime.:
Take a walk without headphones, allowing space for your thoughts
Enjoy your morning coffee or tea in your favorite mug and actually sit down to drink it
Create a playlist that brings you joy while doing household chores
Send a genuine, heartfelt text to a friend highlighting something you admire about them
Pull out something you love from your closet and wear it now, without waiting for that special occasion
So here's your reminder (and mine): Get dressed — even if no one will see you. Speak kindly to yourself — especially when no one will hear it. Make time for the little things that make you feel like you.
You are worth the effort even on the most ordinary days!
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